Ladies, Check Yourself.​

Remember when we talked about being sexually liberated?

Well, there are some things you should always keep in mind…

So this article is for my ladies who are already and/or flirting with the idea of being sexually liberated.

Some of us don’t know what we’re getting ourselves into when we decide to have carefree sex, myself included. And I say this in the most literal way possible. 

So before getting involved, check your feelings at the door and remember that this may be the most important decision you will have to make because sex is often entangled with emotions.

Let’s pretend you’re out and about and a guy approaches you. He’s cute and seems to be feeling you and as he keeps talking you become interested. So you exchange numbers and maybe go out once. You see potential in him, but he’s made it clear that he doesn’t want a relationship. So you do the next best thing — you have hot sex with him thinking that maybe he’d change his mind, but he doesn’t.

Or maybe you’ve even hooked up with a guy a couple of times and you thought nothing of it at first. But now you’re seeing him differently and catching feelings.

So instead of feeling powerful and liberated, you’re left feeling confused and hopeless. — And maybe even a little crazy and obsessed.

For whatever reason we decide to hook up with a guy, we have to keep in mind that carefree sex is carefree! Meaning no emotions or feelings attached. So after waking up the next morning after hooking up with a guy, don’t expect him to text or call and tell you how much he likes you or wants to be with you.

Even if these are the best orgasms you’ve ever had, says Krystin Arneson, a writer for glamour. This isn’t a boyfriend — which means standard pillow talk and hanging out one-on-one outside of the sex sesh is sometimes off the table.

Whether we like to admit it or not, some us just aren’t capable of having carefree sex, and that’s completely normal.

According to Christine Hassler, a writer for the Huffington Post, “our desire to connect emotionally is amplified when we have connected physically because of the hormonal change in our brain AND because we are emotional creatures.”

But when it comes to hookups and casual sex, you have to be prepared to expect nothing more than a good lay. Otherwise, “you’re bound to be disappointed if you’re secretly hoping for more,” says Carolyn Kylstra, a writer for Cosmopolitan.

So before getting hot and heavy with a guy, “be honest, ensure you’re emotionally ready and don’t expect bells and whistles,” says Carly Spindel, a writer for stylecaster.com.

Being sexually liberated can be what you make it to be, it can be easy, and/or exciting, and fun. Or you can make the situation hard or stressful. — However sex should always be fun, so ladies save yourself the trouble and know what you’re signing yourself up for.

Because trust me you don’t want to end up being the chick that’s checking her phone every minute to see if he texted or called to confess his new found feelings. Instead, walk through a guy’s bedroom doors with only one expectation in mind — it’s on and I’m out.